Pleased as punch

I have been occasionally getting good news lately from the boss down at the plant, but recently I received the best news yet. It seems that transfer to the Ball Bearings Division has gone through with a salary increase and that will be where I'll be setting up shop sometime in the 07. I have to thank my fellow employees and the management at Trentino Manufacturing for their support. It has been a long wait to find out where I'll be heading, but it feels great to know that things have worked out. I still have some transfer applications pending at other sections of the plant (wheel greasing, unit housing, custodial), but I feel comfortable making my choice now.
I've gotten everything I had hoped for, so my task now is to work hard down at BBD (Ball Bearings Division, in case you've already forgotten) and not mess up this great opportunity. I hope your new year is as happy as mine.

Note: The photo above was printed onto a CD by Kat and Eric. They then sent this CD of doo wop music to their father as a Christmas gift. Rather hilariously, their mom was afraid they had made a CD of hip hop music and called because she was concerned that is what they were sending. That wasn't the case, although we decided that sending Mr. Krouse a CD of mixes from The Game, Nas and Chamillionaire would be pretty funny - just not a very good gift.

The Christmas Message

I haven't the creative wherewithal to wow you with haiku, but I do want to wish all of my readers and the world at large a very merry Christmas. It has been a good year for me, and I hope it has been the same for you. I thank my family (and some other people who will soon be my family) for their help in the past year. It shouldn't take a holiday for me to count my blessings, but sometimes that definitely helps. I don't have much else to say except God Bless Us Everyone.
Now on to what you really come here for: quick snippets from my life with little or no context or information included.
I just finished reading The Spy Who Came In From The Cold by John le Carre. I had never previously read any le Carre because I feared it would be too "le borious" to follow all of the "le gerdermain" what with the spies, counterspies and countercounterspies. But I was pleasantly surprised and would recommend it for a lazy weekend or if you're snowed in at DIA for a fortnight or so. I have already Netflixed the movie (starring Richard Burton) and will enjoy that soon.
I will now begin reading The Devil's Highway by Luis Alberto Urrea. It is a book written mainly about an incident in 2001 when a group of illegal aliens tried to cross the desert near Yuma and 14 died. It is a book in an ongoing local project called One Book Yuma. Kat thought it was good reading, and I think I'll like it too. Despite what you may have heard about Yuma not being one of the brightest cities in a state already regarded as the dumbest in the union, the title may be One Book Yuma but there is more than one actual book in Yuma. In fact, there are actually stores in Yuma that sell only books. I know, strange but true.
Last night, a certain professional basketball team lost for the first time in 15 games. Even though this team fell in defeat, I think the game was probably the Freedarko-est game of the season and maybe all time. That is until March 17, 2007 when the new-look Nuggets face that team, a tilt which could destroy the scale.
As a holiday treat (and because I'm a bad Christmas Gifter, more like the Christmas Grifter) I am willing to offer the Wiz-That Team game from last night (including 54 from Agent Zero and 42 and 12 from Kid Canada) on high-quality VHS if anyone is interested. I've taped and retaped over with about 100 That Team games on about three tapes and they are kind of wearing out. Therefore, I would not be saddened if I had to part with one of them, and it really is an impressive show. Just put it on mute and bask in the glory. Feel free to leave any offers in the comments. But I won't hold my breath. I understand that my obsession is not shared by others.
Have fun and be safe this Christmas. Much love.

What's he doing these days?

That's a good question. So here are some answers.
Has he won any plaques recently? Funny you should ask because the answer is yes. I was recently chosen as one of the five "all tourney" players from a basketball tournament. The team I was on also won the tournament, which was very exciting.
We had easily won our way into the championship round of the double elimination tournament but at that point we ran into a team that had added players or constantly increasing size throughout the tournament. They were like Russian dolls. It was alarming.
We lost a nailbiter in the first championship game for our first loss, but then we faced the problem that our 6-man team had to somehow beat their 12-man team one hour later. I didn't know if we could do it, but we did. The victory was quite satisfying, and I received a hooded (a "hoodie" in the hood) sweatshirt in addition to the plaque. It was a nice way to spend a weekend.
Has he been reading a book? Of course. I'm reading Spook: Science Tackles the Afterlife by Mary Roach. I enjoyed her previous book Stiff about human cadavers. This one is good, too, although I prefer dead bodies to ethereal ones.
Has he been watching stupidly funny movies? Yes. Beerfest was on the agenda last night. It has its moments, but I don't think it's as good as Super Troopers.
Has he been listening to music Keith gave him again? Yes. I'm still enjoying Tapes 'n Tapes. It is excellent.
Has he had some other big things happen? Yes. But he doesn't want to give that information away for free when he still has a chance of getting a book deal. I mean, they're giving those things away to just about anyone these days.
Has he noticed a certain professional basketball team has won 12 games in a row? Yes, he has. But he is exerting incredible self-control and not writing thousands of words about it.

Stewart Mandel and SEC = BFF!!

One word, two syllables: Mandel.
I know I should avoid it, whether Howie on DOND (which is what I think they should rename the show, btw) or Stewart, maybe the largest mainstream media Southeastern Conference fanboy that there is.
Sidenote, if you want Howie coverage, you can go to KatFancy, which is considerately linked right here.
But what I want to talk about is Mandel's latest column on the annual BCS stupidity. In a surprise that should shock no one, he is pushing for Florida to get a shot at Ohio State in Glendale for the new BCS Super-Ultima-Champo Ridiculo-Bowl. The idea that Michigan would be given another shot is anathema.
Full disclosure: I loathe all of the teams involved, and I truly hate Michigan and their accountant/coach Lloyd Carr. I just want to take you through Mandel's charade, FireJoeMorgan style.

So what's it going to be this year, football fans? The team that went out and won its conference championship in convincing fashion Saturday night or the team that hasn't won a football game in three weeks?

Well, Stew Meat, I guess we'll have to choose Florida when given those options. I mean it would be ridiculous to pick a team that hasn't won in three weeks because that means three losses, right? No, my southern friend. Michigan played once in those three weeks in an exciting game that they lost to Ohio State, a team that is legendarily strong this season. And what Stew likes to forget is that Michigan had to travel to Columbus to play the consensus number one team in the nation in a ridiculously-hyped game that may have lived up to the hype. The fact that Michigan's schedule was completed and that its league doesn't have a championship game is not a reason to disqualify it. A lawyer, such as Jay Bilas, Duke Law 1992, might say this sort of argument is "outside the scope."

The reality is, the Michigan/Florida debate strikes at the heart of an issue that's never been formally addressed by the BCS: Is the title game supposed to match the two best teams in the voters' eyes or the two most deserving. Because it's hard to argue against the Gators in terms of the latter.

I don't see why this distinction even needs to be addressed. The obvious question is who is the best. Maybe an example would make it clear: Three seconds left in regulation, the high school basketball coach finds his team down by two and is drawing up a play during a timeout. Does he tell the team to pass the ball inbounds to the most deserving player: Timmy, the senior with Bell's Palsy who spent three years as the team manager only to try out for the team this year and get on the squad as the 12th man? Or does he draw it up for the best player: Lance, the blue-chipper who has scored 30 to keep the team in the game, has a hot hand and would probably actually make a 3 to win the game? I'm voting for Lance. Who deserves what doesn't matter? Both Timmy and Lance would agree, they both want to win to prove they are the best.

But most of all, Florida won what most consider to be the toughest conference in the country this season. Michigan finished second in a conference whose fifth-best team was Purdue.

Is there ever a season when "most" don't consider the SEC to be the toughest conference? It's ridiculously deep, the schedule is always tough, and every year teams seem to trip up once along the way. But Michigan only tripped up once, too, and the team that tripped them up was the team that will obviously be favored to win everything in Glendale.
I guess Stew proves he can read the Big Ten standings by informing us that Purdue finished fifth. I guess his point is that Purdue stunk and still finished fifth out of 11, not 10, teams. OK, noted. Georgia finished tied for third in the unbelievably, nay nearly unfair, SEC East. Yeah, those guys beat Colorado by one point at home. Colorado lost to Montana St. Montana St. got beat by Chadron State. Florida beat Georgia by a touchdown - in Florida. Full disclosure: The game was in Jacksonville, not Gainesville.
I think this stopped meaning anything along time ago. We'll just move on.

"I think the country wants to see the Southeastern Conference champion against the Big Ten conference champion," a politicking Meyer said Saturday night. "I think that's what this is all about."

I have no truck with this (an old-timey phrase I enjoy) being included in Mandel's column. My truck is with Meyer, who obviously revels in this sort of situation because he actually looks like a southern politician, is named after a pope and went so far as to pull out John Madden's official "this is what it's all about" card. The coaching matchup of Meyer (suave, thin, may use hair products) against Tressel (wears a tie, coached at Youngstown St., not afraid to use Clarett) is obviously going to seem more appealing to many voters than Lloyd "Used" Carr (looks like your grandpa, smells like your grandpa, I'm sure for some is their grandpa) and Tressel (Clarett, Clarett, Clarett).

If there was a component in the BCS formula to account for unforced interceptions and opposing stars' injuries, then by golly, the Gators would be in a heap of trouble right now. All it goes by, however, is whether you won and who you beat, in which case it's hard to argue with Saturday night's result -- or Florida's resume as a whole.

I thought you said it should go by who was most deserving, not whether you won and who you beat? And again, you're saying it's hard to argue with Saturday night's result? Yeah, it is, since Florida won a game and Michigan players hung out in their dorm rooms. Stewbert, you are falling prey to what social psychologists call the "recency effect." Michigan couldn't help the fact that they weren't scheduled to play Saturday. I'm sure they would have taken on whoever was put in front of them, but no one was. And Florida's resume as a whole - using Stew's own WYWAWYB matrix is one loss in an SEC schedule. Michigan's is one loss in a Big Ten schedule. If this is your rubric, the dates of the games will prove little.

On the flip side, the Wolverines don't have a game-breaker in the class of Florida's Percy Harvin, who burned Arkansas on Saturday for a 67-yard touchdown run and 167 total yards. Where Michigan's defense gave up 500-plus yards the last time it took the field against Ohio State, the Gators held the Razorbacks to 311 on Saturday, LSU to 318, Tennessee to 220.

This is where Stew starts to get tired and his true SEC blood begins to rise close to the surface. Just before this paragraph he begrudgingly made a few nice comments about Henne and Hart (who, with that name, should form a Hall and Oates-esque band).
Stew, I know you haven't watched much Big 10 football this year, and I know he was hurt for a while, but allow me to introduce you to Mario Manningham. I think he is in Percy Harvin's class as a game-breaker. Here are Harvin's 2006 stats. He played in 12 games, all but one. He rushed for two touchdowns and caught two. That's it for this amazing gamebreaker who regularly broke games beyond repair. Here are Manningham's 2006 stats. He played in eight games and missed four with injury. He caught nine touchdown passes and didn't run for any because that is what Hart is for. And he had more catches and receiving yards than Harvin in many fewer games.
Why would Mandel think Harvin is somehow more of a threat than Manningham? Why that darned recency effect again! Harvin scored half of his season's haul of touchdowns in the game Mandel just watched before he wrote his column. Since Manningham wasn't playing in that game and right there before him in living color, Mandel seemed to forget he even existed.

"There's a lot of people making a lot of decisions out there, and this is a big one," he said. "We're going to tell a group of young men that just went 12-1 against a difficult schedule ... that they don't have a chance to play for a national championship? I'm going to need help with that one."

Here's guessing he won't have to give that speech. In the end, the voters will -- and should -- opt for reward over rematch.

First, as to the Pope's comment: Here's your help, Michigan only lost one game, too. And if the voters choose your team to play Ohio State, isn't Grandad Lloyd going to have to tell his men they don't have a chance to play for a national championship under the same exact set of circumstances? Are you going to offer help to him from the Vatican as you should, Pope? Now, it is possible that Senator Meyer was making a very incisive comment that Michigan, by dint of its previous battle against No. 1 Ohio State had "played" in a quasi-National Championship game a few weeks ago while his team of Gators had yet to "play" a national championship game. This is an interesting argument, if he knew he was making it, but ever since the first fall practice everyone has known that the real national championship game is Jan. 8 in Glendale. To argue otherwise is disingenous.
And as for Stew's parting shot, it's truly biased that he presents the argument as the alliterative reward vs. rematch. I think some readers may feel a rematch would be a reward. But the SEC fan in Stew won't allow it. There is only one choice for him, which makes his contribution to the debate sort of pointless.

Final full disclosure: I don't really care who plays Ohio State. I just would prefer that the arguments be presented with equal ferocity on each side. Sports Illustrated could have presented someone for the Michigan side in a separate column since Mandel's take was not exactly a surprise. But the only other article I could find at si.com about the issue was B.J. Schechter's, which voted for Florida as well. And, in an example of ridiculousness that may top even Mandel's, Schechter's column does not include the word "Michigan." That isn't a joke. Control F that thing and check for yourself.
My feeling is that Florida will be the choice in the end, which makes this exercise sort of pointless. Especially since we'll know in only a few hours. However, I think a disservice has been done to Michigan solely because they shared a conference with the obvious best team in the country. This allows people to say they didn't win their conference, lost a game and don't deserve a rematch. But I ask you, Stew, and you, dear reader, as I close what I'm sure no one will read to the end: If the Big 10 is so weak and the SEC is so strong, why was the only number one v. number two game of the season within the Big 10 and how can an 11-team conference be so easy if two of its teams are the best in the country? Thank you for your time. I bid you good morrow.